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Ways To Save Marriage
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Ways To Save Marriage In Trouble
A marriage in trouble can be saved if both parties are willing to make a concerted effort towards repairing the damaged union. There are numerous ways to save marriage but to begin the process the initial problem needs to be determined. After a neutral discussion where both parties emerge knowing what is wrong and needs to be fixed, the process should begin. Seeking the help of a counselor could be vital to this process.
Every relationship, especially a marriage, can see rocky moments from time to time. A marriage is more complicated in nature when problems arise due to the living arrangements, children, and financial aspects involved that may not exist in a coupling. Usually marital problems can be much more painful because of the intensity and length of the relationship. How does one distinguish between a simple series of spats and real troubles?
Knowing when a marriage is in trouble depends partially on how well one knows their spouse. Did that nasty spat last night and the criticisms exchanged result out of frustration or genuine feelings? Does the lack of communication occur because you are both tired or is it something more substantial?
First, focus on the hard facts about what has happened recently in the marriage. If necessary, make a physical list. Take into consideration things that have happened that are out of your control. If you have lost your job, maybe the discord is related to stress you are both feeling about monetary issues but is being manifested in other ways like fighting about the children. Simply put, find the bare bones issue (or issues) at hand that is causing the strife. This is the first step to save marriage.
Next, recognize your own faults in the issue. It takes two people to fight but only one to save the marriage. That person must be the rational one who can see things plainly. Seeing things plainly means also knowing that each person is equally guilty at causing the problems at hand. After coming to terms with what is truly wrong, what one's faults are, and developing an action plan, then it is time for discussion.
Sitting together to discuss the issue should be on even, unthreatening terms. The problem needs to be recognized and then solved in a manner that is agreeable to both parties. Only as a last resort should it be decided to end the marriage. The discussion needs to take place tactfully and keep in mind that it is not an attack session. The point is to bring the issue to consciousness in order to save marriage and save love.
There really is no problem that cannot be solved or compromised over. Usually, the level of hurt involved is more damaging and hinders the process than anything else. Broken trust and insecurity, especially when the issue involves adultery, can be fatal to a marriage. Healing and reconstruction of the marriage takes time and a substantial commitment from both parties. Both parties must be committed to save marriage and remain so.
After committing to save marriage, there needs to be an acknowledged effort to rebuild what has been damaged. Getting to rediscover the other person through 'dates' or just intimate discussions can be vital to this process. Counseling is also important. Instead of expressing hurt toward each other, and doing detriment to proggress made, a counselor can help relieve this and also offer tips on healing. Remember that time will, and does, heal most things. Marriage included, if the effort is made.
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